Turkey Coma

Here is how it all started

Ready to go

And this is how I woke up this morning

I must say I did better then last year when I woke up days later in the doctors office

3 More Hours

To kill time I'm going to take a nap. Why not, it is really nice out!!
Bet you don't have sun like this in the north pole, huh fat man!?

The Parade is STILL on

Luckily the bird is in....5hrs to go

In the mean time I stopped to take a glance at this fabulous parade they gawk over. How dumb some of these people must be, I mean really - who doesn't know Kermit the Frog, but they feel the need to put his name up there - that's the type people who watch apparently.

Oh man and here he is - the fat man everyone waits for

::SIGH::

Now we are talking

A pan is out

Ohhhhhh yea - clean, prepped and ready to go in.....

What a mean looking bird, grrrr

Freakin Parade

That dumb Thanksgiving Parade is keeping the ladies of the house from taking care of business!

I'm trying to take matters into my own mitts over here!
How crucial do you think it is that the plastic come off?

Furry Friends to the Rescue

Yes I have been looking this entire time and guess what...one more peak outside and the sweater clad fur balls of the house had it cornered in the back yard.

So I climbed up on it so that it couldn't get away again

I made sure it wasn't going anywhere - don't I look intimidating
This bird is going no where

Proud to sit near the heroes of Thanksgiving 2009
Guess these nutty looking pups know a thing or two about food!

Now I need an adult to help unwrap it - the mitts, ya know - I can't do it myself
Always being held back

Rise and Shine - It's Turkey Time

Get up people it's time to roast a turkey....
Here is my dilemma, I can't find the freakin bird...I've been looking all around for the past hour - any ideas...

Not in the fridge
And to top it off I think I twisted my ankle climbing up there

Not outside or in the back alley behind the house

Not even in the spa
Ok I admit I was peeking here to see if by chance it was left open and I could go for a quick dip, but still - no turkey there...

Oh man - No time to waste, if we are gonna eat anytime soon I better find this thing!!!
I'll be back

Honey - I'm Home

I'm Baaaaaaaack -

I know you are all thrilled to see my return, because let's be honest - your life is probably lame and you need the excitement of a midget santa to brighten your day. Well, I will try not to disappoint.

So last you heard from me I was shipping out of town, sick of the holiday cheer and the crap from the fat man (my jolly frienemy from up north). For those of you in a box, a frienemy is: A "toxic" person who poses as a friend but subconsciously or consciously wishes you harm. (Definition provided by urban dictionary).

Well as promised when I left - I went straight to sin city and made me some money - everyone knows you can't last long without money. The tables were good to me.From there I, well I stayed in Vegas a bit and did some partying. I got a high rollers suite, met some girls, partied with some more girls, drank a barrel and had a blast.
Well after some time in Vegas, I went to the airport with plans to fly out to Jamaica. Well I fell asleep in the airport and missed my flight, I was bummed so I had some more drinks and gambled on the airport slots and lost all my money...Stupid nap
I tried to find some of the girls I partied with but it turns out that without money, I'm not cool - WTF, well I guess I knew that but I was still pissed they wouldn't help me out even a little.

So anyway, it took me a while but I hitched/stowed my way back home - my "family" is a pack of weirdos but at least they take care of me and accept me for who I am. When I got home I saw a lot has changed - The man of the house got a new truck, there's a new tv, the fury 4-legged yappers are bigger (and the runt is healthier) and they got a Wii - they must have had it a while cause they are pretty good and even have some new games.
Never thought I would say this but - I'm glad to be home. I think they missed me too.